Take a moment and ask yourself, honestly and clearly: “What is bringing me joy today?” They are simple words, arranged in a standard manner. For far too many people though, this plain question packs big time baggage for them.
“What do you mean, what is bringing me joy today? I have credit card debt, a bad back, my son is on drugs and I’m behind on the rent again! What’s supposed to bring me joy from all that???”
OR they prefer to respond:
“My job used to bring me joy, and my ex-boyfriend did before he left me, and that amazing apartment on the ocean I had before it burned down did, but what do you mean: What is bringing me joy today?”
Of course there is the classic:
“Nothing is making me joyful now, but when I have a Mercedes and a wedding ring on my finger, then I’ll be happy.”
Here’s the truth: it’s completely understandable that these experiences are causing you distress! Who wants to be in pain, feel loss, grasp to get by or have to wait for their ships to come in??? Not one human on Earth never has, does or will!
The reality is though that it will happen at some time (to each and every one of us) and the way you choose to experience it will say volumes as to how quickly you will be freed from the potentially destructive emotions attached. As we have brilliantly heard time and time again: “Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.” So I ask you:
How prepared are you to release suffering and accept AS TRUTH that joy comes not from how much stuff you have, but from how much consciousness you have?
YES! Joy comes from the love of a partner. It does! IT FEELS GOOD TO BE LOVED BY ANOTHER! And yes! Joy comes from having a deeply fulfilling job that inspires you to hop out of bed in the morning and get to work. And I know firsthand that for me, joy definitely comes when going from 0-60 in five seconds in my brand new Mercedes Benz.
All of these things BRING you joy, but it’s when you ALLOW the carrier of this joy to do its job that you actually feel the bliss!
- The Benz is there…but it’s the act of letting myself to feel excited that brings the joy home! ALLOWING is the carrier.
- The job is there…but it’s because you’re grateful for purpose that makes it so rewarding! GRATITUDE is the carrier.
- Your partner is there…but it’s because you appreciate the love in your life that makes it so important! APPRECIATION is the carrier.
- Your health is there…but it’s your mindfulness of how marvelous perfect health is that matters! MINDFULNESS is the carrier.
So you can see how at the end of the day, it has NOTHING TO DO with the Benz, or the house, or the man, or your corner office, or the labels on your clothes, or your health, or your family. It has EVERYTHING to do with how these realities in your life MAKE YOU FEEL!
You can feel excited in a Benz or a clunker, you can feel purpose with or without a job and most importantly, you can ABSOLUTELY have love in your life with or without a partner in it, because you love yourself, which trumps all others.
So I ask you…again…What is bringing you joy today?
Positively and energetically yours,
Thomas Dunleavy, CPC